Patience is learnt OVER time
tests. They say patience is a virtue, it is true – but this comment makes
you think patience is a quality that only a few chosen ones have. In fact,
patience is learnt over time even if some parents don’t do well on this
chapter at first. But, with a little effort, any parent can learn to be
patient and to amuse himself over some situations that not so long ago
annoyed him.
Firstly, you have to learn to have patience with yourself. Do not
blame yourself for everything and show tolerance – without falling into the
trap of self-content. Happily for children, adults are mature persons and
know, most of the times, to keep their nerves under control. Don’t raise
your voice and impose your wills with a calm but firm tone, no matter the
problem.
Generally, try not to think about tomorrow and don’t let yourself
become overwhelmed with perspective problems. Focus only on immediate
problems, because if you do otherwise you will only worry a lot more and
you will get upset easier.
A lower stress level will definitely inflict more patience on your
side. Also, try to explain the child, calmly, what is it you are expecting
of him and the ways he can rise up to your expectations. Restrain from
blaming him. And if we already are on the subject of expectations, it is
essential not to ask of him more than he can give you, based on his age.
Children sometimes seem to try on purpose to test the limits of their
parents′ patience. If you fell this is what your little one does, ask
yourself what might push him to this. Maybe he is trying to cover some
frustration, maybe he wants revenge for a moment when you were unfair or
maybe he feels neglected and he’s only trying to get your attention.
Maybe it would be best if you look at the problem from his point of view
for a change: if he won’t learn to be himself a patient person, then he
probably won’t try to help you anyhow on this.
To make your child become a patient person you can:
– Play with him interactive games – this will teach him to wait until
his turn comes.
– Read to him thick books and long stories, leaving to follow-up for the
next evening. Do not give in to his pleads to find out the ending in
the same evening.
– Teach him to plant a tree or to take care of a flower – then he will
learn to be patient until he sees the results of his work.
– If he wants a bike, give money, a little a time, and tell him to save
them for that bike. Of course you will be the one that will give him
the present, but your child will learn to have patience and, at the
same time, the value of money.